It is very to sympathize with a disabled person what it is difficult to understand his feelings suggest a way out to know the real life of such a person.
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I made it up, so you won't find it listed in the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Normal variations of mood and temperament are increasingly redefined as new "disorders," so I'm hesitant to suggest a new one. But this one's real, and it's becoming more pronounced in today's world.
I've identified it from my decades of experience as a business psychologist, psychotherapist and researcher into adult development. From that triple vantage point I've concluded that Empathy Deficit Disorder is a pervasive but overlooked condition. In fact, our increasingly polarized social and political culture of the past few years reveals that EDD is more severe than ever. It has profound consequences for the mental health of both individuals and society. Yet it's ignored as a psychological disturbance by most of my colleagues in the mental health professions.
First, some explanation of what I mean by EDD: When you suffer from it you're unable to step outside yourself and tune in to what other people experience, especially those who feel, think and believe differently from yourself. That makes it a source of personal conflicts, of communication breakdown in intimate relationships, and of adversarial attitudes - including hatred - towards groups of people who differ in their beliefs, traditions or ways of life from your own.
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Take the man who told me that his wife always complained that he didn't spend enough time with their children; that she had most of the burden despite having a career of her own. "Yeah, I see her point," he said in a neutral voice, "but I need time for my sports activities on the weekends. I'm not going to give that up. And at night I'm tired, I want to veg out." As we talked further, it became clear to me that he simply didn't experience what his wife's world was like for her, on the inside. His own reality - his own needs - were his only reality.
Or the computer executive who prided himself on having a stable family life, then casually told me that, even though he recognized the environmental threats posed by worldwide climate change, he couldn't care less. "I'll be long gone when New York is under water," he said. And when I asked him whether he cared about the consequences for his kids or grandkids, he replied with a grin: "Hey, that's their problem."
Then there's the woman who works in the financial industry, who told me she's indifferent to how American Muslims might feel in today's environment, or to being profiled when boarding airplanes: "I think they're all terrorists," she said, "and would like to kill us all, anyway."
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These may sound like extreme examples, but I hear variations of those themes all the time. EDD keeps you locked inside a self-centered world, and that breeds emotional isolation, disconnection and polarization. That's highly dangerous in today's interconnected, globalized world, and it plays out in ways both small and large:
For example, you see it in troubled intimate relationships - when partners become locked into adversarial and oppositional positions. In warfare between groups with different beliefs - like the current polarization over political and social issues. And in current global threats - Tribal and religious groups killing each other; Palestinians and Israelis locked into a death-grip. Not to mention looming worldwide disasters or continued depletion of the resources and health of the only planet we have.
Empathy vs. Sympathy
Empathy is different from sympathy. Sympathy reflects understanding another person's situation - but viewed through your own lens. That is, it's based on your version of what the other person is dealing with.
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A challenged person man has to face trials and tribulations, pangs and sorrows and so on.